"Soon"

So as you all know I am very anxious (happy anxious) to be a mom some day. I'm seriously baby hungry.

For the past 7 months or so it feels like everything revolves around this one topic, but John just hasn't felt ready. Although he's given me many mixed signals on the whole issue (which is a conversation for another time), ultimately his answer was "not yet" mainly because of finances.

About a week or so ago John told me that we could start trying "soon". I brushed it off (due to the many previous mixed signals) and just said "sure". He grabbed me by the waste to get my attention and told me that he meant it. I; however, told him that "soon" was a very relative term and that "soon" may mean something completely different to him than it does me. Then he told me that "soon" to him meant about 6 months...at the beginning of the new year, after the holidays. Not wanting to get my hopes up I told him that our financial state may not change in 6 months so I wasn't holding my breath. "Even if it doesn't change" was his response. That was something he's never said before and he finally got my attention.

That was a huge step for him. He is so scared of the finances that come from having a baby. Not necessarily the baby clothes, toys, and all that stuff, but the doctor visits and medical bills that add up. I understand his concern, so it was a huge move for him to tell me that even if things stay the same...he's up for trying in 6 months. When I asked him what caused his change of heart, he just said that he's been thinking about it a lot and he feels like he's old enough, mature enough, and ready to be a dad.

It's not something that he wants to tell people, but I figure none of his friends/family read my blog anyway so what's it going to hurt to mention it on here? I'm sure you guys won't go blowing up my facebook wall talking about it, right?

 I'm very excited! Especially because it seems like once August hits, the rest of the year flies by! In a couple weeks we leave for our annual family vacation, then we come back and John leaves for a boy's reunion; next we have his cousin's wedding to look forward to, then it's Halloween, and Thanksgiving, and Christmas, and New Years and then....it's time! We'll cross off one event at a time, and before I know it it'll be January and hopefully not long after that we'll be parents.

YAY!!!!

I've got my baby names down. I've got my box of baby things that is building slowly over time. I've got my hubby on board. Hurry up January!!